Long Goodbyes

I don’t mind long goodbyes. I hug them longer than they can appreciate. I think about them more than I realize. I take bunches of pictures. I might reminisce too much. I worry when I don’t hear from them often, but I don’t let them know it. I am happy that they are growing and developing into women, but secretly I wish they were my little girls again. Janet and I pray together every day before one of us walks out the door. I hold her for one beat longer than I need too. My arms remember how she felt. My lips retain the comfort of hers. My nose sends the scent of her “self” to my brain were it will be filed away. My eyes record her style of the day. My mind sends an alert to the world that my devastatingly beautiful gift from God is on her way. For a moment in time I want to call her back for just one more hug, one more kiss, one more prayer. I want to tell her everything my heart, body and soul is whispering to me about her. As she rolls out of sight, I finish the prayer. “Lord cover her going and coming. Bring her back to these arms of mine so we can be us again and again. Never the less Your will be done in our lives. Janet, Lauren, Londyn, Lyric, your husband, father and Gi-Da loves you. Amen.” Glad the tomb is empty.