The Gift

The gift that keeps on giving…

Gift giving at Christmas time can be stressful if you let it. My folks try to keep things in perspective. We do what we can for each other and then we just try to love on each other. Both girls (young women) are home along with our grand-daughter. I was cooking and just happened to turn around and see them all laughing and smiling at something the baby had done. Instantly my eyes watered and I had to stop and absorb the moment. All my gifts were under one roof and happy to be there. I was almost overwhelmed with joy. Then I got hungry…

I find joy in the gifts that I have already received, my family, my peace, my joy, and the promise that there will never be a battle that I will have to fight. The game is fixed in my favor. He has already fought and won the battles on my behalf. He gave his only begotten son so that I can have everlasting life. He also gave me an assurance that I will never be alone on this side of the Jordan River. So all those gifts may be rattled and shaken by principalities but they can never be broken. Try to take a moment and recognize the gifts you have around you right now.

Jesus is a pretty good gift on this side of the Jordan. When these carbon based bodies will no longer hold water, Jesus is the gift that will usher us into everlasting life to be with our father. Jesus is the gift that keeps on giving..

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” John 3:16

Everlasting Father

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Isaiah 9:6.

There are eleven years between my eldest sister and seven years between my brother and I, with me being the youngest of five. When we all get together, we laugh and cry talking about our father who died more than thirty years ago. Each of us had a unique relationship with our father with drastically different stories to tell. For my sister it was the protection and guarded behavior he showed toward her. For my rambunctious brother it was the discipline and disconnection he recalled. For me it was the time spent talking and reflecting on how he wished that he could have done more with his life. We each have feelings of appreciation for what he was able to do in spite of all his physical disabilities as well as the conditions of the society in which he was born. We remember him "fondly" and give thanks for the time we had together.

When I accepted Christ, I met a heavenly Father that would protect me and guard my soul. I learned that He would surely discipline me but would never forsake me. What I love so much about my heavenly Father is that He speaks with me daily about the wondrously glorious life to come for those who trust in Him. My earthly father's wisdom was to prepare me for the ills of this world. Through God's grace and mercy, He prepares me for not only this world, which will not last, but also for the kingdom of everlasting life where my heavenly Father sits on the throne.

My earthly father died and as a family, we need to remember and honor his memory. My heavenly Father was, is, and is to come. He will reign forever as He told to Moses in the most concise way - "I AM that I AM." What's not to love about a Father who will be with you forever?

Thankful for the hedge...

We went to service last night and there were opportunities for the congregation to give personal testimonies of what they were thankful for.  As I listened to what others were thankful for and how God had delivered them, it actually gave me strength and a measure of peace for my tribulations.  My soul began to reach for the power that God makes available to us all.  Here were real examples of His saving grace being expressed by real people. 
Pastor Carter reminded me Sunday of the morning prayers that Janet and I share and the request that is always made.  “Lord be a hedge of protection around our family.”  This year I want to give thanks for those things seen and unseen that His hedge of protection has kept out of our lives.  As I sat there I began to understand that another person’s testimony may have been mine if not for the hedge that God has constructed around my family.  His power is in our praise and in turn strengthens His hedge (of protection).  It comforts me to know that the hedge absorbs all my worries because almost none of those things I give weight to can breach His hedge.  Those that do are for the edification of God’s glory and become my testimony… 
 
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

Making Sense of Your Man

In the early years of my marriage I would walked into my home at the end of a rough day with the weight of the world still draped over me. I could not express to this beautiful woman who had been waiting for me the frustrations I was feeling from carrying the weight of principalities on my shoulders. My lack of pre or present marital instructions pushed me to rely on my troglodyte instincts. Protect and guard my emotions. Most women (and men) knowingly or unknowingly carry the burden of expectations based on past relationship (good or bad) with the opposite sex into the next relationship. Everybody has a “carry-on” bag they bring into each relationship. What is stuffed in that bag can govern how we set boundaries and lanes in our relationships.

Can a woman really make sense of the man she loves? A woman will not be able to make sense of her man or understand his quirky ways until he is able to open up to her his “treasure chest” of true thoughts and emotions. You can be sure he will always tell you how he can “do great things in this world” or “how well he got it going on.” You will never really know him until he can tell you how he truly feels when he discovers it may take a while to do great things. Can you wait? Then you discover those great things may only be good things, or that he is still working on getting it going on cause he really “ain’t” got it going on. In all this can you accept that in his treasure chest he may be holding a fear of failing in your eyes and the worlds? Can you support his dreams even if they are not as clear to you as they are to him? Can you respect and love him while still clutching your “carry-on” or can you put it in God’s overhead bin?

What a man really wants the woman in his life to know is how much he really loves her and to what heights he will go to show it. He only needs to know that it is safe to let you see the man that God has designed for you so he can discontinue the use of the camouflaged version he has been presenting for fear of being less than you may have wanted or expected. If you can make sense of this, you will have made sense of the man you love.

Proverbs 31:10-11
Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
Lord God my Father thank you for the gift that you have given me. Allow me to love, guide and protect her and the union that you have ordained. Second to you she is my best friend and confidant. I will forever lift up our relationship to you in thanksgiving and praise for you chose this woman for this man.
Amen

Pray for Children Without Ceasing

Janet and I try to pray together every day. These prayers invariably include us lifting our daughters and granddaughter up to God. Our daughters are grown and have their own ideas on how they should live their lives. Some of these ideas we agree with and there are some that we do not agree with. Nevertheless we always find a moment to ask God to cover them in their life’s endeavors. We pray for good decisions that are based on His word. We pray to not only keep them physically safe, but spiritually safe.

Job had seven sons and three daughters. The sons took turns throwing parties and were sure to always invite their sisters. Now Job was “blameless and upright” and “shunned evil”. I am sure he may have been inclined to crash a few of these parties and do some soapbox preaching. Instead he would wait until the party was over.

So it was, when the days of feasting had run their course, that Job would send and sanctify them, and he would rise early in the morning and offer burnt offerings according to the number of them all. For Job said, “It may be that my sons have sinned and cursed[a] God in their hearts.” Thus Job did regularly. Job 1:5

He prayed for his children regularly. While you are praying for your children ask God to extend that hedge of protection around all children.

Still Scared?

I read a quotation that said “courage is fear that has said its prayers.” In the Old Testament prayer was a prerequisite before going to battle and even during battle. Joshua asked God to hold the sun high and the moon still (Jos 10:13-14) until he could defeat the Amorites (but it was more like finish them off.) Joshua had some impeccable faith in the prayers he prayed. He believed God when He said “Do not be afraid of them; I have given them into your hand. Not one of them will be able to withstand you.” I am still learning to heed those words when I am scared or in the midst of a storm. A show of faith in the knowledge of a “fixed” battle with the devil ain’t always pretty to those who don’t understand how He works. You appear to be over confident and unaware of your impending doom until that moment when you act on His word. It is that word that you should quietly and patiently wait on. It will come if you slip on a little faith when you pray.

My take is that faith is like good shoes on bad feet on a long walk. You fall in love with them shoes even if they don’t look like Prada’s (or Stacy Adams) because they take you a long way.

If you have any doubt read Hebrews 11. This chapter gives a synopsis of men and women who were scared but had faith in his promises. As they say, the rest is history…

Battling Your Bully

You heard of the stories of youngsters succumbing to the agitations of bullies. They felt that living this life was so hopeless that they chose to commit suicide. The 24\7 information age and the explosion of social media arenas are being held as the driving factor for most of these unfortunate scenarios. Just my thoughts but bullies are not a new phenomenon. I am sure every single person I know, including myself, has experienced the abuse of a bully in some form or fashion. The bully is a person who is intimidating, mean or even cruel in their behavior towards someone they have singled out (presumably as weak). The behavior of a bully is their own internal turmoil directed outwardly towards others. Maybe misery loves company. Maybe the bully is trapped in this interpretation of themselves because they have no idea it does not always have to be this way.

I have had my share of bullies as a youngster and as a grown man. As a youngster my Pop explained that it was okay to be afraid of the bully. Fear was a healthy emotion that would cause my other senses and emotions to come alive. He taught me to concentrate on “now what” … after I recognized fear. Sometimes my “now what” plan was an escape route (run). Sometimes previous experience gave me the “now what” move to make because bullies just don’t disappear or get tired of being bullies. They need some “encouragement” which usually comes when they no longer derive pleasure from others pain. As a youngster I learned to take the joy out of it for them. Some days I came home winded but ecstatic on my successful choice of escape routes. Other days I may have come home satisfied that my “wit” had averted a sensitive and maybe embarrassing situation for me. Still there were days I had to just battle. To be honest I cannot remember being able to say I “got the best” of any foe. However I always won their respect and a workable truce. You will not win every fight, but never fail to let your opponent know they were in a fight. My Pop would ask me about the moment I made the decision to flee, fight, or debate. To my surprise I always had a sense of calm once I recognized that fear was present.

As an adult my bullies have taken on strange forms. They are “things” that I may have coveted or habits that took hold that were contrary to the man I wanted to be. At times I succumbed to the fear. I forgot to think of the “now what”. I could not run, did not know how to fight, and assumed this was my fate. I “sucked it up” and got in my manly muscle role of “doing what I gotta do.” What else was I to do?. I needed to recognize the fear and let my spirit be awakened. My earthly father was preparing me for the bully I would meet on the way to school. My heavenly father conquered death and left me the holy spirit to help me deal with that bully that goes by the simple name of life. Life bullies us while we are trying to live today. It bullies us when we are making plans for tomorrow. Life is the bully that makes you forget or maybe question the richness and fullness you have already been given by the one who drug a rugged cross to Calvary. As tough as I think it has been, or is going to be pales in comparison to the gifts I have already received and what He has in store for me. The bully has no power but what I give it. I have had a marriage bully, a my children must be crazy bully, broke down body bully, self-doubt bully, more month than money bully, and unemployment bully. Maybe you have had these bullies and more. One if not all of them may have sat on your stoop at one time or another.

You scared?

My Pop would say “now what”.

David said: Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the LORD
Forever. Psalm 23:4-6

Paul said: Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands.
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Tim 1:7

Paul also said: Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.
For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers,
nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing,
shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37-39

He Knows when you ready..

I walked into the weight room at college fresh out of high school.  I slid under the bench press bar that had an unknown amount of weight on it.  I took a couple of deep breaths and reached for the bar.  Coach Webb, the strength and conditioning coach came around the corner and almost blew a gasket as he screamed for me to get out from under the bar.  It was the first week of practice and our first day of scheduled weight training.  I had never lifted weights in high school.  Coach Webb told me it was 400 pounds on the bench press.  I weighed about 170 pounds (soaking wet with rocks in my pocket). If I could have gotten the weight off the stand, it was a sure bet I would be injured. When you have a weight training program it involves taking a little bit of weight and lifting it several times.  They call it repetition or “reps”.  Coach Webb put us on a program that called for reps on different machines three times week.  Every other week we “maxed out”.  We attempted to lift our maximum amount on the different machines.  Based on our previous work outs coach had this uncanny way of predicting what weight we would max out on.  He paid attention to our training and physical conditioning and could predict how much weight we could handle.

 

About 18 months ago I did not know I was beginning some spiritual weight training.  I managed to handle every hurdle that came my way and there were a few.  I questioned the bumps and even the successes that brought a small measure of peace.  It was like driving through a parking lot with speed bumps.  The spiritual bumps were minor inconveniences but they required me to watch my speed and hold the wheel a little tighter.  Some bumps allowed me to maneuver around them so only two wheels bumped over them.  It did not allow me to go any faster or smoother, as matter of fact it made the vehicle off balance and snatched the wheel. There is no appreciable speed gained by trying to avoid a speed bump.  Watch your speed and hold the wheel.

This year my family is not only facing speed bumps but detours into unknown areas.  In past years I am really not sure if I would have been able to lift this spiritual bar or hold the wheel tight over the speed bumps.  In past years there would have been fear, doubt and indecision.  Small reps of spiritual teaching and homework (prayer), have given me the faith that tells me I can lift this spiritual weight.  God had me on spiritual weight training and now it is time to “max out.”  In past years He knew I was not ready to bear this weight, but like all max out times, He will not let me or you bear more weight than we can carry and your spotter (the Holy Spirit) will give you constant encouragement.  

 

You may be going through a storm of some sorts.  It may be a bunch of little ones (in training) or a full blown hurricane (maxing out).  Just know that He not only has power, but is power! He has given you enough of Him to see you through.  He has trained you to be more than a conqueror so that others may see Him in you… Someone you know needs to see Him ..in you.  He knows when you ready  ..

 

^{Romans 8:31} What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ³³ Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies….. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?... ³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Pour Yourself into Someone Else

I had a birthday recently. Funny to think about it this way, but they are important. With each anniversary of your birth you get another chance to make a difference on “the third rock from the sun” in somebodies life. Hope you learned something in the last year, rather it was good or bad. I learned so much in the last twelve months that I cannot get my minds cupboards closed. Rather than let the lessons I learned lie dormant until forgotten, I need to pass them on. I need to “pour” those lessoned learned into someone. My desire as I experience birth anniversary’s is to be able to relate my joy and pain to another brother or sister that cannot “fathom” their success but will willing embrace their failures as their normal. “It don’t have to be so.”

A couple of weeks ago Janet and Lauren trusted me to watch Lyric, my 2 month old granddaughter for a couple of hours (thank God it was not more) as they shopped. As she rocked in the swing (greatest invention in the world), I could not take my eyes off of her. Her little eyes pierced my heart and captured my soul. In an instant I knew what was required of me. Outside of spoiling her, I need to let her know of all that have come before her and what they had planned for her without ever even knowing her name. The struggles and triumphs they endured were not just for a moment but for generations to follow. If you still having birth anniversaries (the assumption is that you are) you should pure some of the experiences that helped you make it from one year to another into someone else. I have been a few places and seen a few things. I have cringed from the pain of a few cuts and bruises that life can bring. I have also smiled and laughed from the joy that only grace can bring. I know this describes you as well. There is a Lyric in your life that needs to know how and why. My pastor instructed us to look for the teachable moment in every day. Pour yourself into someone else.

On a recent date night, Janet and I as usual talked about everything we missed during the week and then some. Afterwards on the way home there was a quiet moment in the car. Because she knows my heart and mind and the “lyrics” in this song, she turned the volume up when this song came on the radio….

If I could
I'd protect you from the sadness in your eyes
Give you courage in a world of compromise
Yes, I would

If I could
I would teach you all the things I've never learned
And I'd help you cross the bridges that I've burned
Yes, I would

If I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
But the part of life I gave you isn't mine
I'll watch you grow, so I can let you go

If I could
I would help you make it through the hungry years
But I know that I can never cry your tears, babe
But I would if I could

If I could
In a time and place where you don't wanna be
You don't have to walk along this road with me
My yesterday won't have to be your way

If I knew
I'd try to change the world I brought you to
Now there isn't much more that I can do
But I would if I could

If I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
But the part of life I gave you isn't mine
I'll watch you grow, so I can let you go

If I could
I'd help you make it through the hungry years
But I know that I can never cry your tears
But I would if I could

What would you do for your “Lyric”?

If you could…..

Working my way back.. Almost there.. I'm back

I feel like I am back.

In old cartoons or graphics, the coming New Year was always represented by a baby in a top hat and diaper, while the Old Year was represented by an old man leaving the room. I would like that old man to stay in the room for a minute or maybe two. A new year inherently makes us optimistic and implies that we have a fresh start. I will admit it is a standard line of thinking for me and plants a "new" perception in my mind. However, the perception may not be reality. The New Year baby does not clean your plate for you. My take is the New Year tends to just spin my plate around and I begin eating from the other side. The problem "meal" still has to be consumed. I tend to change the "angle of the cut" from the other side of the plate. I try slicing it differently hoping it will chew easier or taste better.

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem." - Theodore Rubin

I need the old year to sit down and review where I went wrong and were I went right. Don't leave just yet. Did I too often bemoan my failures and languish in the aftermath? The "Old Years", like old folks are treated as elderly burdens as opposed to being treated as "elders", influential members of a tribe or a community that can oddly enough reveal a few apparent truths. I took a moment to think about the lessons learned in 2010 and the bruises that only "holy" mercurochrome could heal. The old year explained that “He was preparing me for something I would not be able to handle” otherwise.

"When we see ourselves in a situation which must be endured and gone through, it is best to make up our minds to it, meet it with firmness, and accommodate everything to it in the best way practicable. This lessens the evil, while fretting and fuming only serves to increase your own torments." -- Thomas Jefferson, 3rd U.S. President

There are times when we are thrust into situations that cannot be avoided. The "situation must be endured". The trick is to realize that it is a must and not a maybe. Character and discernment will help you decide and decide you must. If it is unavoidable, give it the resources that are needed (mind and body) to complete it. The process will allow you to grow. Fretting and fuming only makes your valley walk longer and more complicated and it ultimately stifles positive energy and mountain climbing strength.

At times 2010 felt like a valley walk for me. I know believe it was a walk of preparation for me not only in the New Year, but maybe years to come. I came out and “I don’t look like what I been through”…

Take a moment with the “old man”. The “elder years” may offer truths for the New Year(s) to come…