Empty House

 

I don’t mind an empty house. When Janet is with Lauren or Londyn I take the opportunity to turn the music up just past her “allowable” settings. The music will turn a mundane household chore into a master piece of domestic artwork. It will open a creative highway that takes me to a place in my office\studio that lights up my mind with possibilities. Then there are times when the right song (anything from Stevie or EWF) will remind me of the void that her absence leaves. I don’t know if it makes sense but it is not that I “miss” her. It’s that sudden realization that she is not “here”. I am not sure I can deal with being “here” without her. Crank the next song up a little louder.

I love you sweetheart! Glad the tomb is empty.

Road To 40

      

Our Road to 40… Harlan High was the catalyst for our relationship. The University of Chicago was the “jump off point” where you decided I had potential and called off the chase. There were long good byes on King Drive. Then long drives from Carbondale to Dallas. Our relationship is like a small stream that turns into a full blown river on its way to the ocean. Oceans are vast, deep and largely unexplored. After 40 years we still have so much to look forward to. You didn’t give me your heart on consignment. You told me, then showed me it was mine by pouring your life into mine. I promised God I would not spill a drop. So I want us to live each day like it is our last. Someday it will be. Let there be no doubt about our love for one another or our life together. I love you sweetheart. Glad the tomb is empty!

Pop

 

Walter R. Peeler. I called him Pop. We only shared a few years together but in retrospect I believe I got the best he could give before God called him home. I was twenty years old and away at college when he passed. Our last three years before I went off to college were our best. I began to listen to him and not judge him. Up until I was sixteen I seemed to always be at odds with this man who talked in metaphoric circles. I began to sit still and take notice to the life he wished he had and the life he wished for me. I finally understood that it was not rants and waves that I was being engulfed with but his heart. A heart filled with the hope of me being a good man, a better man. He frustrated me at times because he never would give me a straight answer. It was usually a question for a question. He required me to think before answering his question. He passed away suddenly but it was as if he squeezed all of him into all of me in those three years. I wish so much that I could let him know that I am a good man striving to be a better man. I wish I could have shared all the milestones in my life that he wished for me. The day I pulled away from the curb to start my journey in life I think he knew I would be alright. Though our time together was short, his effect on me has been profound. I was his Timothy and he was my Paul. Proverbs 27:17 says iron sharpens iron. Glad The Tomb Is Empty.

Why

 

I have heard it a few times. “Why do I have to tell him\her I love them all the time?” That is a tough one for some. Not for me. It is not that I say that I love Janet “all the time.” It's the timing that matters. There are times when I hear her say my name in a certain way or when she smiles at something I said or “about” to say. It is when she knows my mind is stuck in a loop of indecision or about to make a declaration. The words for me just seem to flow! My heart releases the words that I can only hope convey the true essence of our relationship. I love you. It is not the volume; it is timing. It is who she is that provokes those three words. But the best answer is when I say them, I “feel her spirit” move towards me even if she is walking away from me… I love you sweetheart. Glad The Tomb Is Empty